Bicycle races are coming your way

A-whoops. Don't know for sure that I can do either of these, or if I want to, but here's the haps on cycling things coming up this weekend.

First up, on Saturday we have the World Naked Bike Ride. I'm torn between making a reference here to "Naked in the Rain" or "Naked Pictures (of Your Mother)". Oh, can't decide... can't decide! I love how easily my life has a soundtrack for everything. For the low, low cost of no dollars you'll get the chance to ride and make friends with all of the crazily dressed and non-dressed cyclists of St. Louis. The pre-ride party kicks off at Black Bear Bakery @ 7p; the ride itself @ 9p.


Following that, on Sunday there is the Urban Assault Ride to benefit Trailnet and Bicycle Works. Registration is still open for this scavenger hunt & obstacle course shin-dig for those folks willing to plunk down $65. For those not, I'm sure it's a spectacle worth seeing. I envision something like kooky Japanese gameshows come to life right before my eyes, and I would like to say that I am a full supporter of bike jousting in the case of it involving someone other than me. The fun starts in Forest Park near the tennis courts @ 9a, with assorted checkpoints scattered throughout the city.

Like I say I'm not sure that I can do either of these, my plans for the weekend are pretty up in the air, but if anyone goes there's a possibility I may show up and bump into you. In other developments, there are a couple more cycling things in the pipeline, which I will get to later.

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Now playing: Queen - Bicycle Race
via FoxyTunes

Please keep quiet and don't spoil the ending

I just watched The Search for Spock, and the question in my mind is: what's the big deal? This is what the trekkies are gettin all worked up about? I mean, sure, we get to watch Leonard Nimoy kicking out the jams. Sure, there's the whole William Shatner versus Christopher Lloyd (spoiler alert!) battle to the death. I for one am all about the celebrity versus celebrity battles in films, my personal favorite being the time when Bruce Lee KILLS Chuck Norris. And I did dig seeing that time-traveling, taxi-driving, toon-murdering bastardo get what's coming to him. (And ol' Billy gave him what for, too. If you haven't seen it yet and I ruined it for you... too bad. It's twenty-five years old. Get with it.) But on the whole I felt it a waste. An angry planet as a plot device? Please.

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Now playing: The Aquabats - Stuck in a Movie
via FoxyTunes

...hands in the air like it's good to be alive

In other cycling developments, an assortment of things I've seen lately that I think are worth sharing:

#1
ARTCRANK...
Saturday, August 29 @ someplace or another (trying to figure out exactly where and when)
...is a showcase of bicycle-inspired original, affordable poster artwork. It's a bike art party open to all, with free admission. And posters are priced to let everybody go home with at least one original work of art. ARTCRANK has held packed shows for the past three years in Minneapolis, and the first-ever show in Denver this year was a huge success. Now, it's coming to St. Louis.
ARTCRANK St. Louis will be a one-night event featuring original poster artwork created by St. Louis area artists and designers. The event is scheduled just before the start of the Tour of Missouri, so excitement about cycling and bikes will be at a peak. All we need is a group of talented and motivated artists to create bicycle-themed poster art.

#2
What: “Spoked!” - A Juried Art Exhibition
When: Opening Reception (public invited): Friday, September 4, 2009 - 7 to 10 pm
Encore Viewing Party (public invited): Saturday, September 5, 2009 - 7 to 10 pm
Tour of Missouri Race & Special Events (public invited): Monday, September 7, 2009 - 12 to 6 pm
Exhibition: Through Friday, October 2, 2009
Where: Soulard Art Market & Contemporary Gallery
2028 S. 12th Street, Saint Louis, MO 63104
(Corner of 12th and Russell, across from McGurk’s Pub)

www.SoulardArtMarket.com

Admission is free. Refreshments will be provided, featuring Schlafly beer.

Working in conjunction with the Tour of Missouri, which is a world-class cycling event, we are proud to announce our exhibition “Spoked”. We sought out bicycle themed artworks from some of the area’s most talented and respected artists for inclusion in our show. Our gallery is on the race route and we have special hours and events planned that are sure to draw a crowd. The eyes of the world will be looking our way and we’re gearing up for the liveliest show this town has seen. Get stoked about Spoked!

#3 Sometimes people are so effing awesome that I never get tired of watching in amazement. Moving house via pedal power.

#4 Safety first


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Now playing: Flobots - Handlebars
via FoxyTunes

No Handlebars

Official deets for the Big Lebowski Ride

Step 1 - Meet @ Pat's (6400 Oakland) at 6:30 for pre-ride food and beverages. An alternate meeting spot will be Turtle Park for anyone more inclined to hang out outside.
Step 1.1 - Be there with bells on. Come dressed as your favorite Big Lebowski character or in your best bowling wear, cause there's a prize for best costume.
Step 2 - Roll out at 7:30. Ride to the Old Post Office Plaza, with sights including the Meeting of the Waters fountain and the City Garden. On my own, I do like to do a pretty healthy pace. And I'll be honest, for me "healthy" usually is "as fast as I can, and what's all this nonsense about 'pacing yourself' actually mean, anyway?" If you cannot ride at said pace, I would suggest doing it peloton style. If you cannot ride at said pace even while drafting (and it does make a huge difference), or are too worried about crashing to ride that close, I would point out the more beer I find myself drinking, the slower I will be. All that said, I'm not planning to go nuts and I'll make sure that we don't drop anyone. Don't be scurred.
Step 3 (and this is the part I figure we'll play by ear the night of)
Option 1 (13ish miles) - Return from whence we came. Also known as the "no fun option". But hey, that's just me.
Option 2 (13ish miles) - Head over to Washington Avenue for bowling @ Flamingo. Word on the street is they have $2 White Russians and bowling games.
Option 3 - Option 3 is dead. Le sigh. And I was really looking forward to the dancing like no one is watching, too. The floor is now open to awesome suggestions for an alternate. My first thought is Atomic Cowboy, where my boy DJ Uptown spins hip-hop and there's no cover.

Things to bring:
~Lights, head & tail
~Lock
~Sumthin comfy yet portable to sit on
~Snacks & drinks, if that's your thing (but no glass bottles)
~Helmet (this is a recommendation, but I'm nobody's daddy)
~Camera ('specially if you know where its charger is)
~Lots o' water (weather dot com says it's balls hot)

If there's anything I've forgotten, I'll come back and post it here.

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Now playing: Flobots - Handlebars (DJ Shadow remix)
via FoxyTunes